The Empty Chair

by Adam Manning

Those who join BNI, the world's most important business network, do so in the hope that it brings them more business and more income. Everything about the way BNI works is designed with that goal in mind – more business and ultimately more income for our members.

One of the core principles of BNI is regular and consistent attendance. This isn’t some code of honour or rule of good behaviour – it’s simply because regular and consistent attendance has been shown to be a key way to get more referrals. That’s why it’s one of the most important rules and one point that the Membership Committee monitors the closest. The rules are very clear and this point is set out in bold: Attendance is critical to the group.

The value in regular, weekly attendance is that it is the best way to help relationships flourish. Referrals happen when other members know enough your business to be able to refer you to their contacts. The better, deeper relationship you have with other members, the more likely this is going to happen. If you attend consistently and regularly, in accordance with the rules, other members will know more about your business and, just as importantly, about you. They will be in a better position to be able to refer you with confidence to their contacts as a result.

Attending every week is a fundamental way to allow those relationships to develop to begin with and then to strengthen and ultimately mature. Seeing other people every week is an easy way to get to know them quickly.

If you don’t attend every week, as the rules require, you are implicitly telling everybody that you do not fulfil the commitments that you have taken on by agreeing to attend regularly. You are letting everyone down by showing that you are not dependable or reliable. You are telling everyone that you cannot be trusted or relied on.

If you don’t attend, you won’t get to meet any new Visitors to the meeting that week – you will be missing out on a potential source of new contacts, clients and referrals. Members work hard to bring Visitors in the hope that they will be a good opportunity for new contacts for everyone. By not attending, the message is that you don’t care about any of that.

By not attending, people don’t see you and you are less to the forefront of members’ thoughts about getting referrals for you. Out of sight, out of mind. Members will be more reluctant to refer you if you can’t be trusted to be there. These principles can be summarised in three words – Visibility, Credibility and Profitability. Visibility – letting people know who you are. Credibility – letting people know you can be trusted. Profitability – making money from your membership.

The Empty Chair, ladies and gentlemen, is all people will see if you fail to turn up. Don’t do it. Don’t do it, for your own sake. Woody Allen is famously reported to have said that 80% of success is showing up. BNI takes that message very much to heart. If you snooze, you lose!